IT'S WRITTEN IN THE STARS...

...or possibly in a misbehaving computer programme

Oh how I laughed when I saw this in this week's Saturday Telegraph...

 You mean the Horoscopes in the magazine may be nonsense?!?  Surely not.

Page 29 did, as promised, show the 'correct version'.  Or indeed the Horoscopes That Will Definitely Come True.

But the magazine version was much, much better.

 Ooh that makes perfect sense. I wish I was a Virgo.

Another great one.  I am loving these!

The Telegraph Astrologer seems very keen that no-one is put under any pressure this week.  I like the sound of this and only hope that everyone else has taken heed.  Especially at work.

Here's my Horoscope for the week ahead...

I am so going to accept an invi week!  I'd be mad not to.  I will naturally remember not to put 'them' under pressure, it's only fair after all. And as for letting them 'feel that they are tation' - this is surely sound advice for anyone - regardless of birth date.

In my younger days I must confess I did have a lot of time for horoscopes.  But, as I matured, the holes Astrology filled were taken up instead with Husband, Children, Dog, Hugh Laurie and Cadbury's Chocolate.  (I've just realised that sounds a bit rude.  Shame on you.)

If the Horoscopes were like this every week - I'd happily make space for them once more.