Monday, 16 February 2015


It seems I live on a building site - and have done for the past many months - and I am a bit tired of it now *melancholy sigh*.

Nobody likes living among building work (I imagine?) but at least when it's your own you get the lovely outcome at the end of it all.  The extra bedroom, the sunny garden room, the utility room with extra loo...

But we have been surrounded on 3 sides (does that count as 'surrounded'?) by other people's building work and all we have to show for it are frayed nerves, a growing pile of other people's cigarette butts, and a missing garden waste bin.  (Where this went is anybody's guess - it's bloody huge and it's clean disappeared!)

Thursday, 22 January 2015


word for you letter box oldWords.  Ain't they great?
Indeed, Mr W and I first bonded over a Dictionary. (That sounds rude and it really wasn't).

We'd sit in his office randomly dipping into his Chambers Dictionary (still not rude, so why does it sound like it is?) My how we'd laugh at some of the rich and varied words our language offers up.

We'd also derive great entertainment from running together the words at the top of the pages - you know the ones in bold.  For example the top of page 360 in our Chambers bears the gem 'Confound Conglomerate' - which I'm sure many people do. Page 966 has 'Liberty Lick' - which sounds like a porn star.
I imagine.

Wednesday, 17 December 2014


Sometimes I feel like an alien visiting from another planet.  Mostly during mealtimes with the family
when they all talk animatedly about some television programme they've all seen but I've never heard of.  Also when I am 'out and about' as well.  (I used the inverted commas there because 'out and about' is not a phrase I usually like to use, but use it I have.  I guess I wanted to separate it in some way from my otherwise 'usual' prose.  There I go again.  What is it with all the ' 's?)

One of my side-lines (apart from being an internationally renowned blogger and sought-after panel show guest) is making wooden Christmas decorations.  I love it. I feel I am one of Santa's Little Helpers - which is either sad or sweet, depending on your viewpoint.

Friday, 21 November 2014


I have been 'blessed' with a fizzog which, in repose, looks like I am the most disapproving, snarky, mean person ever in the world ever.  This is most unfair because I am none of those things (except maybe a bit snarky sometimes, but then I'm usually just trying to be amusing).

Basically, I am quite a happy little soul.

This, however, is not reflected on my face.  My face says, 'I am entirely miserable and I heartily disapprove of you'.

This is not me begging for reassurance, this is me being honest after seeing way  too many photographs and videos with me looking for all the world like I despise every person I am spending time with.  Which I do not.

My kids call it my 'Game Face'.

Saturday, 8 November 2014


'The Transport of the Future'
When we were kids, my brother and I had a couple of big old books from the 1950s that I think must have belonged to my mum, or her brothers, when they were youngsters.   My brother kept them in his room, mostly because he was the eldest, and partly because I was inclined to 'mark' the pages of books with a red biro.

These old books, among their tales of derring-do, included full page illustrations entitled, 'How the World Will Look in 1975!' These pictures caused us endless amusement with their prophecies of personal flying saucers and hover-highways.

Confidently I proclaimed that all the major developments had already been made.  There would be no more major leaps in technology or lifestyle because, 'if you think about it', I said, with total conviction, 'there is nothing more to invent'.

I know.  What a nob.